Steve Jobs: Smooth Criminal

Steve's a smooth guy, we know this. Witness his near-flawless execution of the keynotes. Marvel at how he keeps a straight face when asked about secret projects. Not that he always keeps his cool, but I certainly wouldn't want to play poker with the guy. The criminal part? Well, I'm not talking about stock options, I'm talking about crimes Steve has committed in front of us all, or admitted to publicly.

So remember the prank call to Starbucks during the keynote? Word on the street back in my school daze: prank calling is illegal! Of course, there's a right way and a wrong way to prank call (ask the Jerky Boys). Steve was wise to end that call before someone started pouring the coffee...

Now think back to November 2006, when Universal Music Group's CEO made the bold statement that iPod users are thieves, or, at least, their iPods are full of stolen music (I was just holding it for a friend, officer, honest!). Well hey, maybe he's right. I still don't see the Beatles on iTunes, and yet, somehow Steve had them on his iPhone... So Steve, do we get a copy of Limewire on our iPhones or what? You sneaky devil!

Lastly, don't forget Jobsy's hacker roots. OK, Woz was the real hacker, or prankster in this case. Steve's clicker failing provided everyone in the room with a trip down memory lane. Back when the FCC didn't really worry about a couple of college kids jamming the airwaves and wreaking havoc on nerds in the common room... And then there's the association with a certain Captain Crunch, aka John Draper, and tinkering with Woz's Blue box. That was certainly a crime, although one that was apparently never pursued (despite Draper's arrest and conviction). Boy Steve, what other criminals do you hang with today? Are they as smooth as you? I forgive ya, as long as I can call for free on the iPhone by emitting a 2600 Hz tone...

[Asbestos claim: this is tagged as humor, please make a note of it]

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Steve's a smooth guy, we know this. Witness his near-flawless execution of the keynotes. Marvel at how he keeps a straight face when asked...

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Victor Agreda, Jr.

JeffDM, the only reason CD's don't have copy-protection is for the simple fact that, at the time the spec was being developed, no one (well, almost) thought it would be a trivial affair to copy the CD. Anyone remember the fiasco surrounding DAT? They had to implement a crummy copy-protection scheme because tapes really were easy to make perfect, digital copies.
/history lesson

January 17 2007 at 8:22 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

I really don't care what the music execs think, format shifting a copy you legally own is still legal and don't distribute the rips. The problem with ripping DVDs is that it runs afowl because of the circumvention of a copy prevention system. CDs don't have that.

January 17 2007 at 7:07 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

That's amusing, that you all think this means the Beatles are coming to Itunes.

It's not the first time there's been a Beatles reference in Jobs' keynote, it won't be the last, and it's grown way beyond "hinting that the Beatles are coming" and is now well into "messing with the Beatles IP ownership."

I'm glad to see it creates a bunch of news for you guys, tho.

January 17 2007 at 11:58 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Rene van den Abeelen

1) The Beatles on my iPod and my Macmini-jukebox... well: there's nothing illegal about that. I own the cd's and copied them. So?

2) The phonecall to Starbucks... a smart way of advertising.

January 17 2007 at 9:55 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Victor Agreda, Jr.

you guys realize the music companies aren't thrilled about you ripping CD's, right? they tend to scratch their heads and wonder why ripping a DVD is verboten, but CD's are OK... that was the point of the quote from UMG's CEO...

January 17 2007 at 7:56 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

sam

I have to agree with the general consensus that while there's a "humor" tag, the post itself is neither remotely funny nor well written. I know you're the guy in charge of TUAW and all, but can't you leave this kind of stuff on your personal blog? Also if you're going to write about Jobs' sinisterness, how could you have left out his handicapped parking anecdote?

January 17 2007 at 4:02 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Rogério Rocha

A agree with everyone's comments. Geez, can't you read between the lines?Can't you take a joke?

I thought the Starbucks call was hilarious. So did the other three people that were watching the keynote with me.

Don't you have CD's? I have Magical Mystery Tour and the three Anthology albums. And, if I'm not mistaken, Apple pays royalty-fees to all the artists featured in the keynotes. (Go and watch M$'s CES keynote and see that a whole chunk was cut from it "in respect of intellectual properties" a.k.a. cheap jerks)

And in regards to the music on my iPod: "SOSUMI"

January 16 2007 at 10:19 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Baden

Steve could have just ripped the beatles off of a cd, duh

January 16 2007 at 9:14 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Laurie

I'm pretty sure the Starbucks call wasn't staged. The Starbucks he called was across from our hotel and when I went in there later in the week to find the girl that answered the phone, no one really knew what the heck I was talking about. It was admittedly a different shift when I was there, but I think it was genuinely off the cuff - planned, yes, but not rehearsed, which is different. I think SJ was just feeling a bit mischievous. What would have been better is if 4000 lattes did appear a few minutes later and were handed out to the audience - like when Oprah gives away cars and iPods ;)

January 16 2007 at 9:04 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Likkie

Hmm, its tagged a humour, but I'm still waiting for the punch line.

January 16 2007 at 8:38 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply