Want an iPhone app business without all the boring hassle of actually programming and releasing iPhone apps? Boy, does Brice Milliorn have a deal for you! He's auctioning off his iPhone app business, which he says has 87 different apps for sale, over on eBay.

Milliorn says he started out developing apps on his own, but the business is just too big for him to keep up so he's selling all of the apps and their rights, all of the source code, and technical support for two months to transition everything over to the new owner. He doesn't specifically say that he'll transfer the developer account on Apple's App Store to your name (he says he'll send over a DVD with the source code and transfer "the whole kit and caboodle" to you), but we presume that's what will happen -- of course if you go for it, you're doing this at your own risk.

What will a burgeoning App Store business, complete with apps like iSexyRef and Swine Flu cost you? Just a cool $100 grand. That's the starting bid in the eBay auction, which has just over a week left and no bids as of this writing. There are certainly less expensive ways to get started selling apps on the store. It only costs $100 to register in Apple's Developer Program for a year, and then you just need to find a developer you can pay -- or even do it yourself with a helper service).

If you'd rather start off with a bunch of marginal to silly 99-cent apps and happen to have an extra $100,000 lying around to spend (maybe for a nice holiday gift?), here's your opportunity.

If you're the kind of person who complains in the comments whenever we post a useless app, then just move right on from this weekend post (or go check out Paradise Monkeys, it actually looks like a good one). But as weird and pointless as this app may be, we have to give the folks behind this iLickIt game credit -- they really took the multitouch screen to a place it probably shouldn't go. The idea is that you get a plate of food from Grandma, and then you have to lick it clean... by actually licking your iPhone or iPod touch. No thanks.

Actually, iLickIt isn't the first app that's asked you to lick something that's been in your pocket (and who knows where) all day long -- there's other ice cream-licking related apps on the store already. But its claim to the very first "iPhone game you play with your tongue" may actually be legit -- it actually times how long it takes you to lick up the food and turns it into a little game. Though we can't really recommend it, it is coming to an App Store near you, so just in case your tongue hasn't had enough to do lately (and yes, I'll just let that one go), there you have it.

Electronic Arts has released the Wolfenstein RPG for the iPhone and iPod touch -- the game is available on the App Store for $4.99 right now. It's based in the world of Wolfenstein, but it's not your normal first-person shooter. Instead, it's actually a mobile turn-based RPG, adapted from an older cellphone platform for Apple's handheld. Considering its origins, the game looks pretty good, and it's got a silly sense of humor as well -- you can read books to gain abilities and power-ups, or play a chicken-kicking minigame. Reviews are pretty excellent on iTunes, so if you're looking for something a little different to play as a role-playing game, it might be worth a look.

Even more anticipated than this game is the Doom RPG, with the same type of gameplay, but set in id software's Doom universe (notable, among other things, for its BFG weapon). Odds are that if this game does well, the Doom RPG (and maybe even Orcs and Elves, originally seen on the DS) probably won't be far behind.

Snow Leopard is going to be uber cheap, so there's not really any reason to not pick it up -- if you make good, regular use of your Mac, odds are that you'll also make enough use of a copy to justify the value. But even if you're not taking the $30 plunge, Macenstein has the most important part of the OS upgrade covered: the wallpaper. Just like the OS itself, Snow Leopard's wallpaper is only an incremental update from the current version (Macenstein says it looks "faster," and we can see what he means), but just in case you want to at least make your old G5's look like they're all upgraded, just "Set as Desktop Background" and there you go.

Rumors that the wallpaper will actually make your computer faster (or give you back that 6GB of hard drive space that the actual upgrade will give you) are unfounded, and probably shouldn't be trusted. But then again, you never know.

The Wall Street Journal's Digits blog takes a look at "crap apps" -- those pieces of junk on the App Store that do one thing and do it pointlessly, whether that thing be farting or belching or making the sound of fingernails on a chalkboard (yes, really) or what have you. And they come up with a very intriguing, albeit obvious, reason that the App Store seems so filled with completely terrible and silly apps. Why? Because they sell.

Yes, even "legitimate" iPhone developers -- those people working hard to create an innovative touchscreen interface, or bring some crucial functionality to the iPhone -- are finding that of all the apps they release, the crudest and most stupid are the ones that sell. They profile a guy whose serious movie apps aren't selling, but whose cobbled-together-in-five-minutes gimmick apps are making a mint. In short, the reason our App Store is full of way more fart apps than apps like Twitterific 2.0 is because people are paying for the fart ones. The message we're sending with our wallets is that if you want to make a million dollars on the App Store, don't toil away to polish your groundbreaking award-winning puzzle game. Just give us a gag we can show to our friends.

Is it right? I'd say no, but then again, even I have been pulled in to a gimmick app or two: I bought Cat Piano (in my defense, I've gotten enough entertainment out of it to find an easter egg: shake your iPhone while playing). But next time your finger is poised over the "Get App" button on that 99-cent belching app that you just know the friend you're seeing later will get a total kick out of, think to yourself: is that two-second gag worth an App Store full of crappy apps?

Good afternoon, and welcome to your daily brainload from TUAW, a division of Weblogs, Inc. owned by Comcast Online. Please make sure the neural connector is clicked in all the way, and then think "Start" when you are ready.

Steve Jobs returns to Apple's Board of Directors after stint at GM
Steve Jobs announced his return to Apple today after a government-mandated stint as CEO of General Motors. Obama White House spokesperson Ruth Christopher stated that since Jobs had saved the American auto company with the introduction of the extremely popular flyCar, he could return to his usual duties. Apple executives released a statement saying they were "overjoyed" to have Jobs back on the job.

New MacBooks and Mac mini appear on Apple Store site
Apple has quietly updated its legacy line of personal computers, adding exabyte molecular hard drives and gigacore nanoprocessors without raising the prices. Fans, unfortunately, were unimpressed with the updates -- "my implants can move faster than that," John Gruber transmitted to his brainload feed, along with a TwitFeeling of disappointment and anger. But Apple defended the updates, stating that the new computers were "perfect for the older member of your family who still need their hardware in the box, rather than out of it." Anyone who has purchased one of the older units in the past six months (if there are any of you out there still buying hardware) can be eligible for an exchange at any Apple center.

MobileMe announces record number of subscribers
Over three billion people have subscribed to Apple's MobileMe service since its reintroduction two years ago, according to a new study transmitted by analysts NPD. Apparently people love the fact that they no longer have to carry an iPhone, a laptop, or any hardware at all, as MobileMe now works directly with tiny processors implanted into your head to bring you brainloads, news, TwitFeelings, and the Webview over the cloud directly into your visual and memory cortexes.

"People really love not having to deal with devices or pesky buttons," said an NPD analyst. "MobileMe allows them to connect directly into the ethersphere, leaving them open to do or think or feel anything while anywhere." The price of the system was also lauded as one of the reasons it's so popular. Apparently after the big economic meltdown in 2010, Apple's customers are thrilled to get a full-service communication package for just over a billion dollars a year. "MobileMe has never been so worth it," said longtime user Dave Caolo.

Apple announces event next Tuesday: "Go ahead. Take a guess, suckers."
Press outlets around the brainsphere have recieved invites from Apple for an event next Tuesday in Chicago's Willis Tower (up until two years ago, events like this were held in San Franscisco at the Moscone Center, but of course the unfortunate earthquakes and flooding in 2014 mean that all of California is currently underwater). Rumors are flying about what might be announced at the event, but Apple hasn't given any indication of what there might be -- in fact, the invite itself features a question mark, and the text: "Take a guess, suckers. You still haven't gotten it right."

Most brainloaders have speculated that the event may finally feature the debut of the long-awaited iTablet, or maybe, finally, the reveal of The Beatles unenhanced audio recordings into the iCollective. Either way, TUAW won't be there: we still haven't gotten an invite. But we will, as usual, be providing Mike Schramm's unfiltered thoughts on the event live as it happens. Remember to make sure your children are unplugged at the time.

It's probably time for me to lay off of Smule -- I've said that their Ocarina app might be the silliest musical app in the App Store, but we have a new winner: Cat Piano is just plain loony: a piano made up of cats meowing, like those old Christmas recordings, but playable. There are a few different cat sounds to play (from "Furball" to "Housecat"), and even a regular piano if you just want to tickle the ivories a little bit. Most of the reviews on the App Store say people are using it to mess with their cats, but there's definitely a musical instrument here -- if Ocarina can be used as an instrument, the Cat Piano can, too.

And in fact, the developers are challenging you to prove it -- they're giving away a Nintendo DS (interesting choice of prizes -- an iPod touch might be more apt) to the person who makes the best video using Cat Piano. I don't know if you could beat that Jingle Cats video, but you can certainly try. The contest starts on Thursday, and goes until March 20th, so you've got a little over a month to get the cat sounds down.

Ocarina, you'll remember, also turned out some watchable videos, so we're interested to see what comes out of this contest.

Roald Bradstock is a champion javelin thrower, but lately he's been throwing more than that, including an egg, a golf ball, and a soccer ball. You know when people start breaking random things in creative ways, an Apple product will show up. Sure enough, in the video above (turn the sound down, the wind noise is horrendous), Roald tosses an iPod a football field and a half.

There's no reason why he should do this, but it looks like Apple expected this might happen some day -- despite a mess of mud and grass, the iPod is apparently no worse for the wear. You might say it's silly, you might say it's not impressive, but then again: could you do it?

And if you do, could you post it on YouTube, too?

[via Macenstein]

It's late Friday night, you're stepping out of the bar into the cold after a few drinks, and as you head towards the car, you stop, realizing that it might not be the right time to drive. But how can you know for sure? Simple -- you just pull out your iPod. Because the iPod hasn't had enough random things attached to it, there's the iBreath, a breathalyzer that connects to the bottom of your iPod or iPhone and will not only tell you what your BAC is, but transmit your iPod's audio to your FM radio as well.

You've gotta be kidding us. Not only should you never drive after drinking, as even legal levels can be dangerous, but even if you just want to know your BAC you can buy a regular breathalyzer for a lot less than the $80 this one costs, and you don't even need an iPod to connect it to.

But we'll give these guys their credit -- of all the things you can attach to an iPod, this one might be the strangest.

Gizmodo's Jesus Diaz has a wonderful solution to the problem of videoconferencing on your 3G iPhone: compact, convenient and battery-free!


Okay, we get it: a camera on the front of the iPhone is probably a pretty useful idea. Although there's something oddly compelling about turning a videoconferencing session on the iPhone into a Morris Day and the Time concert....

Christmas is approaching, and what better way to wile away a minute or two than with a virtual snow globe? The kind folks at Pop Art created this iPhone Snow Globe that one 'shakes' by changing the orientation of the iPhone (using this method, perhaps?).

It'll amuse you for a moment, and it is free so why not? That's what the holiday season is all about, right?