The latest gossip: eMac wants a nip/tuck

AppleInsider, one of our primary sources for that contraband we like to call "Apple rumors", is claiming to have the word on a new education Mac to replace the now defunct eMac. Apparently the all-new eMac will be based around G5 processors and.... wait. That article's from two years ago! We can only conclude that when AppleInsider brought us news of the G5 eMac that they were joking. Obviously, now they're being serious.

This latest rumor features several key points:

There was an education based Mac in the past and there isn't one now. AppleInsider connects the dots using complex logic to predict that Apple is making a new education Mac.
Teachers and schools will be buying computers in the summer to be ready for the next semester. When people want to buy things, you should try to sell things.
Apple went Intel, so the new eMac will feature an Intel chip. Not a G5 or any of those crappy PowerPC things - who ever liked them anyway?
The eMac's bulky enclosure was its most expensive part. Apple will therefore choose NOT to lose money on an expensive, pointless and bulky enclosure for the next eMac. A tough choice to make.
Thanks to that aggressive rumor scrounging that AppleInsider does on our behalf, they obtained the extremely specific information that the new eMac *might* be available to the average consumer. But it also might not.

For extra entertainment, place the word "duh" after every bullet point.

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AppleInsider, one of our primary sources for that contraband we like to call "Apple rumors", is claiming to have the word on a new...

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Matt J

I don't think Apple will be naming any single computer model the 'Mac', because they use it as a term to refer to all their computers.

May 28 2006 at 4:57 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Lee

Oh no, Conrad, don't get me wrong, I thought this was a great post. I'm criticizing AppleInsider's logic, just as you were.

May 27 2006 at 3:07 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

John

That describes my feeling about rumor sites perfectly! Good humor by the way....

May 27 2006 at 12:57 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

merrickrider22

if this was real they could call it "Mac" to fill the gap on the way to the "Mac Pro"

May 27 2006 at 12:04 PM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Conrad Quilty-Harper

Lee, the sarcastic tone of this post obviously went over your head :).

May 27 2006 at 11:28 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

Spencer

i bet they keep a somewhat bulky enclosure. It makes it harder for people to khife it.

May 27 2006 at 11:22 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

jomy

I hope eMac = iMac mini
Take the same great iMac industrial design and shrink it down to fit around a 13" widescreen display (as found in the new iBooks).

Education Prices
CoreSolo Mac mini = $579
CoreDuo Mac mini = $779
13" CoreSolo eMac = $799
13" CoreDuo eMac = $999
17" iMac = $1199
20" iMac = $1599

May 27 2006 at 11:19 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply

None

"Thanks to that aggressive rumor scrounging that AppleInsider does on our behalf, they obtained the extremely specific information that the new eMac *might* be available to the average consumer. But it also might not."

So then, it basically covers all bases? I could predict this garbage. They're making a computer that might be sold to consumers, and it might not? You don't have to be a rumor expert to decipher this.

May 27 2006 at 11:08 AM Report abuse Permalink rate up rate down Reply