Update: As announced, the iPhone is to be activated with iTunes, in the comfort of your own home/office/local Starbucks. So much for the unboxing anxiety.
You've saved your pennies, and then thought better of the whole penny-centric strategy. You've moved on to cashing in your savings bonds. You've figured out which AT&T store is furthest off the beaten track. (Google Earth has a suggestion -- try Key West, FL.) You've considered the delicate balance between on-queue caffeine intake and the likelihood of line jumping when you dodge out to the restroom. You've planned, thought, considered, and strategized pretty much everything about getting your hands on that iPhone.
But have you considered whose hands will handle it before you do? Well, have you? Reader Chris Freitag, a fan of the Apple unboxing experience, had a panic attack earlier today and did the only reasonable thing. He told us about it.
A horrible, terrible thought crept into my head today as I fantasized about what it will be like to actually get to the counter of my local Apple Store the evening of June 29 and finally get my hands on my iPhone.
What if the first hands to touch *my* iPhone aren't my hands?
Unfortunately, judging by comments on Erica's post, the contract and activation process will almost certainly involve hands-on time with store personnel. Unless Apple's magic mojo arrangement with AT&T includes online contract setup and number porting via iTunes (now that would be quite a trick) it looks like the first hands on your iPhone won't be yours.
I've been a Cingular customer for over 3 years, and every single time I have purchased a new phone the customer service rep opens the box, removes all of the plastic wrapping from the phone, battery, and battery cover. They put the SIM card into the phone, power on the phone, then proceed to futz with the phone for a few minutes while they're setting it up. This has never been an issue for me because I have never had an attachment to the packaging nor to the product being opened. I like cool new phones but none of them have ever had much of an emotional impact on me.
Now compare that with Apple products. If you're as into Apple products as I am, then you understand what it means to come home with your shiny new Apple toy and open the packaging. The good folks at Apple always take such great care in packaging that it is a true joy to open the products. Everything about the presentation just leads you to that moment when you actually utter the word "whoa" as you finally get to the product you've lusted after for so long. It is without fail sleeker, smaller, slimmer, and sexier than any picture could convey. It's part of the Apple experience.
And if an AT&T employee unwraps all of that Apple-designed packaging goodness right in front of me, and then mauls my new iPhone with their grubby mitts, I'm going to lose it right there at the store.
Chris, we feel your pain.
Update: Some readers have suggested that buying the iPhone at an Apple Store will be a closed-box transaction; you would then have to take the iPhone to an AT&T store or activate over the air. We don't yet know for sure how any of this is going to work.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
6-22-2007 @ 9:12AM
bryce shearer said...
hey i would tell the person straight at the counter that i am going to open my phone so back off. i mean if i am paying 600 big ones for it i should at-least be able to open the package, right?
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6-22-2007 @ 9:15AM
MikeE said...
... well, that's why you should buy it at an Apple
Store and personally take it to the AT&T store. Then on the way, you can grope it as much as you want...
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6-22-2007 @ 9:16AM
William Beem said...
Seriously, who gives a shit? Get a life, people.
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6-22-2007 @ 9:17AM
Query said...
When I got my (Cingular) phone a few months ago, they put the SIM card in the box without even touching the phone. I guess it depends on the vendor.
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6-22-2007 @ 9:19AM
john from Buffalo said...
Just offer free sex and a picture with your friend Elvis... then grab it and run (noting the fact you must pay for it first).
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6-22-2007 @ 9:20AM
AndyK said...
Wow! I had exactly the same feeling!!!!
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6-22-2007 @ 9:24AM
Jonathan said...
Chris's dream made me laugh out loud. Perhaps because I understand exactly what he is saying. Why is the last week always the hardest?!?
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6-22-2007 @ 9:34AM
Seventy Threeman said...
What kind of OCD is this fear exactly? Are Mac users / iPhone fiends under the impression that Apple products are somehow constructed by beings from another planet? What about the poor sods in China crouching and soldering all day to get you an iPod or somesuch.
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6-22-2007 @ 9:39AM
Jason said...
are you kidding me?
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6-22-2007 @ 9:40AM
Dave said...
You know, even if you do get to unbox it, about a dozen Chinese people have already touched it before you...
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6-22-2007 @ 10:01AM
Al said...
TUAW + iPhone = retardation
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6-22-2007 @ 10:03AM
Eleventeen said...
Dave's comment is the best one on here so far!
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6-22-2007 @ 10:07AM
Frank said...
normally I am an Apple fan as well, but come on this is just pathetic.
An "emotional attachment?" It is a box that a phone is in. Not just one unique phone but a phone that 3 million people are going to have that day. Lets face the facts about who is buying the iPhone: 75% of them are spoiled schoolkids who will just wind up scratching the phone screen in the first week and scraping the hell out of the back over the summer. 24% are asshole businessmen who are going to look pathetic with the iphone added to their arsenal of belt clip cell phones. And then the final 1% are nancy fanboys like this dude who are going to cry because some minimum wage paid worker for AT&T whose face resembles a relief map of Peru is going to put a SIM card in their phone before they get the chance to take pictures of the box to put on Flickr.
This release is going to be worse than the PS3.
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6-22-2007 @ 10:08AM
Albert Martin said...
Hilarious.
Go to the Apple store to pick up your iPhone ... they don't activate it which means they have no reason to take it out of the box. Problem solved.
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6-22-2007 @ 10:10AM
michael said...
To quote Spinal Tap, 'there's such a fine line between clever and stupid'. To think this kid is actually losing sleep over this...get a life.
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6-22-2007 @ 10:20AM
Facundo said...
I dont think this man's gonna have that problem...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cep7wAj6dvg
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6-22-2007 @ 10:23AM
David McLeod said...
I am officially sick of all this iPhone cr*p.
Can we please chill out people (meaning you guys at TUAW). For the love of god, is this worth posting? Is half of your iPhone posts worth posting? I've heard so much about this phone I am sick of it now....stop it, I've had enough of this iPhone stuff, I want to get off!
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6-22-2007 @ 10:38AM
David McLeod said...
Nah, just a bit of sarcasm really (some serious people browse this place :p). Although, I do think that this post/story is a little OTT.
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6-22-2007 @ 10:40AM
Fanboi said...
If all this iPhone crap is annoying you, or you hate Apple in general, why do you come here? Why even bother posting a comment?
Me, I thought it was funny. Because I know exactly what he's saying.
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6-22-2007 @ 10:41AM
NNTPgrip said...
I had a dream too. That this thing was on a CDMA carrier and had EVDO. Then, when I went to browse the web on Safari, it had flash support. Then they let me know that the reason the battery was'nt replaceable was because the case was really sealed, as in waterproof. Also, the first e-mail I got from apple was a notice of the SDK's release.
I don't think any of that is unreasonable. It's funny how even though none of that is there, I still want it because of the pretty eye candy in the UI. I had to put these reasons why not to get it on a post-it and stuck it on my monitor at work and home.
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