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John Mayer's calls to Steve Jobs no longer returned

John, John. OK, dude, behind the sensitive rock star/guitar god front, we know you're a not-so-secret Mac geek. Sure, you jammed out to Message In A Bottle with the Police at Live Earth, but wasn't it just as big a thrill to be onstage for a legendary Stevenote? Wasn't it good, John? Good enough for you?

Apparently Mr. "I'm Going To Serenade The Macworld Faithful" has been sneaking around the country with some other company's smartphone. Sure, Blackberry might sponsor your summer tour, and even provide some exclusive photos and video, but we know what kind of mobile device you're keeping in the pocket closest to your heart, with your guitar picks... and its name begins with 'i' and ends with 'one,' if you know what I'm talking about.

*sniff* Two-timing creep. I'm taking all the photos of you down from my locker RIGHT NOW.

Note: Comments have pointed out the striking similarity between this story and Fake Steve's take on the same issue. While I can think of nobody better to flatter by imitation, the deal is this: I wrote this post very early Wednesday morning (about 1:30 am ET), FSJ's post not yet published. My post was published at 11 am ET on Wednesday, and I hadn't read FSJ's post... which is timestamped 6:58 pm, Wednesday 7/11. Even if FSJ's on UK time, that's still well after my post went live. So... let's just go with "great comedy minds think alike" and call it a day, mmmkay? (Much love, FSJ.)

John, John. OK, dude, behind the sensitive rock star/guitar god front, we know you're a not-so-secret Mac geek. Sure, you jammed out to...
 

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Garrick

Geez, remember the good old days, when the Mac community had a sense of humor? Lighten up, FGS.

July 12 2007 at 9:35 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Slartibartfast

My primary Cell is still the BB Curve. The iPhone has been relegated to novelty gift shop item. I may return it on Friday though. It just lacks the secure functions I need to access the company's email.

July 11 2007 at 7:24 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
AMGoff

I realize there has been relatively sparse Apple news lately, but do you guys even read the comments on this blog? If you're not going to make a separate iPhone blog then could you, for the love of all that is pure and good, not take up webspace with absolute drivel like this.

Unless Jerry Garcia somehow comes back and sports an iPhone could you please keep crappy celebrity-related iPhone nonsense to a minimum.

July 11 2007 at 3:46 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
matthew m. barnes

yeah... you're right. no one cares. nobody likes John Mayer anymore. mabe nobody every did. the grammy awards were a sham. the millions of records sold were probably bought by him and his mother. (Jessica Simpson probably bought some, but might have returned them all.) and i think i must have just imagined the sold out crowd at the Hollywood Bowl last month. i was actually probably the only one there. (though if that's true, i wish i had gone up to the better seats in the front instead of sitting in another time zone to watch the show.)

you are fully entitled to like or not like John Mayer's music. (or anyone else's for that matter.) but to make a stupid comment like "no one cares" just makes you sound ignorant, biased and stupid. i don't want you to look stupid or ignorant. (i'm looking out for you here!) obviously people care. you don't care. and that's fine. so don't comment. don't read the post. see the words "John Mayer" and decide "i don't care... i'll just move right along so i don't say something stupid and look like an idiot. ooh! somebody hacked the iPhone for custom ringtones! that makes me happy. maybe i'll comment on that!" or, if you must comment on this admitedly unnecessary story, go with "i don't care" so you're not speaking for others whom you have no idea about. again... just trying to save you from looking like a moron.

the end.

July 11 2007 at 3:05 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Wayneshorter

Wow - I keep getting censored for trying to post -- this is the third attempt! This story is a dupe from Fake Steve, Michael Rose is trying to stop me from pointing this fact out!

Original Story, for the THIRD TIME:
http://fakesteve.blogspot.com/2007/07/john-mayer-you-are-dead-to-me.htm

TUAW, stop censoring posts! Encourage your contributors to write original content!

July 11 2007 at 2:55 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
David

Haha, this is great.

July 11 2007 at 2:48 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Wayneshorter

TUAW lifts this story off of Fake Steve. What a f**** shame. TUAW is getting worse by the day.

Original story:
http://fakesteve.blogspot.com/2007/07/john-mayer-you-are-dead-to-me.html

July 11 2007 at 2:45 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Wayneshorter

Wow, you directly copied this story from from Fake Steve. TUAW has really been sucking lately.

Original article:
http://fakesteve.blogspot.com/2007/07/john-mayer-you-are-dead-to-me.html

July 11 2007 at 2:40 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
duestown

Hear that, Michael Rose? It's the sound of Jimi Hendrix's ghost making plans to smite you for calling John Mayer a "guitar god."

July 11 2007 at 2:09 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Raphael Salgado

From what I heard, his IP is banned from getting any Mac OS X Software Updates, too. Pity. ;)

July 11 2007 at 2:07 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
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