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TUAW poll: what will Apple announce at Friday's press conference?

When the news of Apple's Friday iPhone 4 press conference came out, a few of the TUAW bloggers were discussing what Apple might want to tell the assembled media. We put our heads together to come up with our best ideas, so please vote for your favorite or give us your take on what Apple will announce in the comments below.

What's Apple going to tell the world on Friday, July 16th?
We're doing a total recall. No wait, Schwarzenegger already did that...2495 (12.9%)
You're holding the damned phone wrong. Let me show you how it's done.2897 (15.0%)
Hey, Microsoft - at least iPhone 4 doesn't suck as bad as Windows Vista!774 (4.0%)
Bumpers for everybody, baby!9622 (49.8%)
The special Michael Jackson memorial edition iPhone 4 glove is now available for $29.99 at all Apple Stores.977 (5.1%)
We're giving you a voucher for a free Bluetooth headset. Wait, that doesn't work, either.236 (1.2%)
We're buying The Unofficial Apple Weblog so they'll stop creating trouble for us.564 (2.9%)
We will coat all your hands in lard!704 (3.6%)
Other - leave us your ideas in the comments below.1033 (5.4%)


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Humor Apple

When the news of Apple's Friday iPhone 4 press conference came out, a few of the TUAW bloggers were discussing what Apple might want to...
 

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teme

Apple will introduce the iThing - a new revolutionary device at a new unbelievable price...

July 16 2010 at 6:50 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
rjr

It works perfect on Verizon's network no matter how you hold it.

July 15 2010 at 8:25 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
ЯïK

1) free fix (not necessarily bumpers) at an Apple Retail Store for the owners of iPhone 4s experiencing the problem

2) change in manufacturing process to " include an internal component that will insulate the defective antenna connection that has disrupted the phone's signal reception" [http://www.macrumors.com/2010/07/15/analyst-claims-design-fix-for-iphone-4-signal-issue-being-deployed/]

3) total recall not an option!

July 15 2010 at 5:57 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Thomas O' Malley

I've been trying to "deathgrip" my iphone 4 for weeks now, and I haven't had a single issue with it yet. It's flawless as far as I can tell.

July 15 2010 at 5:15 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
David

if there is a problem with the metal surface and signal attenuation, why not coat the metal surface with Parylene: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parylene? It's evaporated onto a surface at a molecular level (read: translucent - you wouldn't even know it was there,) and it's an insulator. It's been used for years in the aerospace industry. This coating method got some press a while ago under the name "Golden Shellback" http://gizmodo.com/5028927/golden-shellback-hands+on-phones-can-make-calls-while-underwater . I'm not saying you need to use it to waterproof the whole phone. Rather, I'm suggesting that it's insulating properties be utilized to minimize the so-called 'grip of death' problem.

July 15 2010 at 3:37 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Mondreti

Forget iPhone, lets talk iPad2.0.

July 15 2010 at 2:37 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Ravin Shah

I think that Apple will have a "limited time" giveaway on Bumpers.

Or they will offer free Bumpers to people who bought iPhone 4s during the first week or so.

July 15 2010 at 2:05 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Arnan de Gans

The next Mac Pro... It's about time.

July 15 2010 at 1:33 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
David H

Here's what I think WILL happen...
• An Apple spokesperson is going to get up and say that they are aware that SOME and NOT ALL iPhone 4 users are experiencing issues with the iPhone 4 antenna and the proximity sensor.
• They will then announce that they have resolved the issue with a hardware fix and that they will be rolling out the new devices in the next few weeks. They will then tell people that if they already have an iPhone 4 and are experiencing problems, that they should contact AppleCare to schedule an appointment at the closest Apple Store or ATT outlet to exchange their phone for a new one or get a full refund.

Here's what I think WON'T Happen...
• Steve Jobs will NOT be speaking.
• The new device will NOT look any different than the one that's already out there but will have a special coating or something to resolve the issue that some users have experienced.
• They will NOT offer free bumpers. Don't be stupid people.
• There will be NO APOLOGIES. Apple has absolutely no reason to apologize to anyone. If you think you deserve an apology from Steve Jobs then you're a self important little prick.

July 15 2010 at 1:24 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
redkatanax9

Just a free bumper won't quell all the bad press, hopefully they'll even offer all iPhone 4 customers something like $50 credit toward next iPhone purchase. That should win them some good will.

July 15 2010 at 12:12 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
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